As Ramadan is the month in which the Qur'an was revealed, it is customary to try to read the entire Qur'an in this period
My first experience of the blessing of Ramadan happened before I was Muslim. My friend and I were walking in the countryside on the outskirts of Slough when we stopped to ask a postman for directions. He immediately offered us a lift in his van back into town. He explained that it was Ramadan and he was fasting and that this made him think about other people more, and he was concerned that we looked cold and tired. His kindness has formed one of my lasting memories of Ramadan and what it means.
Of course the essence of Ramadan is fasting, of trying to draw closer to Allah, of renewing commitment to do good actions and acts of worship that hopefully will continue after the end of the month. It a month for the Qur'an, for prayer, for thinking of others, and for family and friends.
Ramadan: Private Festival
In a non-Muslim country like England, it is a private festival, with very little awareness of it outside the Muslim community. Unlike our very commercialized Christmas, which seems to start in November, Ramadan's presence is not in our face every time we turn on the TV or step out the door. A sizeable portion of the UK population is thoroughly sick of Christmas before it even arrives. In contrast, Ramadan is a period of relative restraint. After fasting for 29 or 30 days, you don't even need a party or presents to be happy — it is just good to be able to eat in daylight hours, even though there is a certain sadness that the blessed month of Ramadan is over for yet another year.
One big contrast with Christmas is that, at least in this country, Muslims seem to have few customs associated with Ramadan or `Eid. This could cause major problems for the schools of England if we were to convert to Islam en masse. Picture the busy classrooms of England at Christmas time: Kids earnestly shaking glitter onto Christmas tree cards, making advent calendars, painting Christmas puddings, robins, holly, sticking cotton wool on snowmen and Santa Claus's hat, icing biscuits in the shape of crackers. Then the teacher turns to you, anxious to include your child's culture in the scheme of work. "So what do Muslims do then?" The sum Muslim contribution to school art and crafts is typically a black card stuck with gold stars and a silver moon.
In a bid to reduce this serious lack of Ramadan-related paraphernalia for Muslim children, without pandering to self-indulgence, Islamic Relief made some Ramadan calendars with a date-shaped window to open each day, and a good deed behind each window. They also produced penny boxes for kids to save money to donate to charity. My children loved both of these ideas (though they would have preferred chocolate behind the windows), and we took full advantage by giving them pennies for helping round the house.
Of course, the English Muslims do have their very own pantomime. It takes place in the last couple of days of Ramadan, when Muslims congregate in their mosques and hover by their telephones to find out if they told their bosses the right day to take off work for `Eid. At our local mosque we normally go by the Saudis' date, which is also broadcast on the TV, but of course there are always some groups who disagree, and start and finish at a different time.
There is something really special about the time when the whole family gets together for iftar. There is often a cloth spread on the floor, covered with good things, and as the time draws close there is a hushed anticipation, as sakinah (tranquility) seems to descend on the household. Then the announcement is made and it is time to eat a date and drink some cool water. When I first became Muslim, I really appreciated being invited to iftar by a Muslim family, or being given a gift of curry and rice by someone. It means a lot to new Muslims, without relatives to share this special time. Thankfully for us, Muslims are very hospitable people!
My Family in Ramadan
In Ramadan, people tend to make a special effort to attend prayers at the local mosque.
Now that I have children of my own, I try to create this peaceful feeling for them. Just before we break our fast, we switch on Islam TV so we can wait for the Adhan and feel as if we are participating with the whole community of Muslims. When it is time, we share out slices of fruit, dates, and water. After prayers, we serve the main meal with our favorite dishes and maybe some sweets like baklava, the sweet fudge-like burfis, or chocolate. Favorite foods are the sublime Pakistani-style brown rice that my father-in-law taught me to make, kebabs, stuffed vine leaves, hummus along with Yorkshire puddings and roast potatoes. However, in the morning, we tend to go traditional English, and have oatmeal porridge for its long-lasting energy release and ability to stave off hunger for as long as possible.
Our children became convinced that fasting was some sort of forbidden fun that we adults were selfishly and unreasonably reserving for ourselves. So last year we let them try it too. They soon realized how difficult it is, especially when — as my Muslim relatives point out to their kids — fasting is not just of the stomach but also of the tongue: You are not supposed to fight with your sister when you are doing it!
In contrast is the incredulity of my English acquaintances when they find out about fasting. "How can you go all that time without food?" "You'll get ill." "Yeah, but you're allowed to drink though, aren't you?" When I first tried fasting I discovered for myself that, although it was uncomfortable, it certainly wasn't impossible. With time, I adopted a mind-over-matter technique of short-circuiting my thought processes every time I thought of food and turning my mind to other things.
Two beneficial occupations for the mind at this time are prayer and recitation of the Qur'an. In Ramadan, people tend to make a special effort to attend prayers at the local mosque. However, this is not something I am able to participate in. Our local mosque, a converted building like many in this country, does not have suitable facilities for women. I used to attend church services regularly, and I would love to be able to take my daughters to prayers in the mosque sometimes. They know more about church services, through school, than they do about prayer time in a mosque. This is why on `Eid, we sometimes travel a long way to a mosque where women can attend, but it is not the same as celebrating in your local community where you know the people.
As Ramadan is the month in which the Qur'an was revealed, it is customary to try to read the entire Qur'an in this period. I became Muslim because of the Qur'an, I am learning Arabic because of the Qur'an, and I love to read it because, as the following quote says, "The exterior of the Qur'an is elegant and its meaning is deep. Its wonders cannot be enumerated, and its marvels will not cease." Ramadan mubarak, blessed Ramadan, everyone.
** Halima Columbo is an English Muslim married to a man whose parents come from two different cultures (Spain and Pakistan), and with three little girls.
العرض العادي
